How to deal with unrequited love - John Travolta and me
Posted: Thursday, March 13, 2008
by LeahG Artist
Cartoon & Illustration Services
Many of us have been there at some point in our lives, when the object of our desires either doesn't know we exist or they do and just doesn't seem to care. Perhaps they do care but are already in a relationship (forbidden love) or for other reasons cannot or do not love you back.
I can recall being 16yrs old and being madly in love with a blonde haired blue-eyed boy a couple of years older than me. He was one of a group of friends I hung out with and I saw him nearly every day after school. We got along well and he seemed to like me, but as the days passed he began to grow distant.
I noticed fleeting glances between him and my best friend, but thought nothing of it. She was my best friend after all; if she liked him too she'd tell me. I had known her since we were 5yrs old. I had her back, she had mine.
Then one day while out and about the object of my desire used a ten pence coin to purchase a plastic ring from a street vending machine and he gave it to her. She cast a look at me; I felt her searching (dreading) my reaction. My gut wrenched, my heart was in my mouth, I knew then at that moment, that they were dating and had been dating behind my back perhaps for some time.
Were they laughing at me, sharing private jokes at my expense? Did she tell him how everyday at school I'd talk about him endlessly and write his name on my books. Did he know all this about me?
I couldn't speak. I started to walk, slowly then quicker, my friends followed, wondering where I was going. I was acting mighty peculiar. A bus had stopped at a shelter as I approached, instinct kicked in, rage and tears and I leapt onto the bus. The door closed behind me before my friends had even caught up.
They stared at me through the glass doors as I disappeared out of sight.
Later my friend called me, asking why I'd disappeared. I was upset when I asked her how she could do this to me. Take the love of my life away and behind my back too.
I was very upset that night. I forgave her though and him too and we continued to see each other as friends. But I noticed a strange thing. He liked me to go around when he saw her, like I was the entertainment or something. So I stopped going. He ended his relationship with her shortly afterwards. It was strange, I was part of that relationship whether I was aware of it or not.
Looking back it seems quite unreal that I felt so strongly about such a seemingly small matter, a childhood crush. I smile as I reminisce.
Leah left the retail and health management world a few years ago to become a freelance writer and artist. She now enjoys creating funky vibrant cartoons and illsutrations for websites, promotional materials and as gifts. Leah would love to illustrate her own children's books in the future. Presently she is creating cartoon and cartoon mascots for business clients.
Visit LeahG's Cartoon and Illustration Services website here for updates and latest art work.
Hi there - J.T. just doesn't know what he's missing - though I suspect his wife is okay with that :-) I think of my kids, my son who is 17 and trying to re-coop from the loss of his first love... It does hurt to watch. But as you say - we grow. My husband was my first love - I met him 8 days after I turned 13. He was 17. When I told him just a week after that that he was going to marry me someday, he laughed. Why wouldn't he is was just a nagging little brat. I guess I had the last laugh. March 28th will be 24 years since I stole his heart. I do remember how it hurt that he didn't give me the time of day back then. Good thing, otherwise he would have been a creeper!!! :-) As always, thanks for the memories. Teresaaww Theresa that's soooooo romantic!!! Great story :) Are you doing something special on the 28th?
He wants to go play Lazer Tag with our kids - my daughter is planning a special b-day party for him. That will be special enough. We are hoping to do something very special for our anniversary in Oct.well sounds fab, have a great time!
Ahh, unrequited teenage love...I've got a closet full of broken hearts on that subject. You know what was cool though? I recently went to a high school reunion, I won't say what number it was, but I did spend an entire year getting into shape for the event, and I ran into a ton of old flames. Not exactly sure what I had seen in these guys and a few even propositioned me to which I was inhumanely unrequiting! lolbrilliant..justice was done!!
hi cre, great story, and one that i am quite familiar with. i am with my childhood sweetheart now, for the past 9 years, after a 23 year break up. we broke up at 19, and reunited at 42! thanks for a well written article, my best, sue thomwow, that's very impressive and lovely. Congrats!
thanks cre, we had some adjustments!! to make, we weren't the same people, and had been through rather bad relationships that angered our hearts and minds, but, we got through the rough spots and are better for it-but that wouldn't have sold me on the pain it took to get there. i'm just glad we're here. thanks, sue
As the mother of two teens I know just what you talk of. Great Article!Thank you Rose!
Unrequited love sucks. Especially when its all you know. My mum never showed me consistent love as a child, none of my crushes have returned my affection.
Except for a single mom 12 years older that I, with 3 kids. Obviously that was never going to work. But all she did was have a slight crush on me, a soft spot for a lonely soul. I was 17.
The unrequited love of my life so far is still in my heart, after almost 2 years, I still cant move on. She was in a relationship of about a year and though he wasnt being a good boyfriend, she stuck by him and I respect her for that. Anyway, I told her how I felt ( I was changing schools and I figured 'what the heck'), helped her work out the problems she had with her boyfriend after realising that we would never be together(after changing schools) and after about 5 months(we talked on MSN messenger and I called her sometimes) I told her that I had gotten over her - we were just friends and that was ok. We never talk anymore, our friendship just kind of, disappeared.
I lied to her for her own sake. I've never stopped loving her.
Anyway, enough of me, I really liked your article. Great job(Y)Thanks - Glad you liked the article.