What Is the Ideal Man - a Domestic Slob or a Kitchen Genie?
Posted: Thursday, February 28, 2008
by LeahG Artist
Cartoon & Illustration Services
You know that saying ‘the grass is always greener on the other side'?
Often I have seen women lamenting the fact their husband is an untrained domestic slob, who can't clean or cook. They can be seen looking into the distance dreaming of a day when their man will surprise them with a three course home cooked candlelit meal, or a lovely clean home, all done with his own fair hands.
Let me tell you ladies, you may feel like you have the short straw, but I can assure you that as nice as it is to have someone who can hold their own in the home it isn't all it's cracked up to be.
Having a man who can cook and clean is only a bonus if they actually do all the cooking and cleaning, but if for whatever reason the bulk of these chores fall to you, the result can be that your efforts are never quite up to their high standard. The doorframes will be checked with a silken glove for dust, and the food will be sampled mid cooking and instructions given throughout. The modern man just can't help but try to teach, judge and criticise. As time goes by, the ‘lucky' female can feel less and less adequate and the self-esteem drops lower and lower.
So what is it like living with a domestic slob? A man who can't operate the washing machine or cook a slice of toast? Assuming they are not taking your efforts for granted, they will often praise, compliment and visibly enjoy the meals you cook. They will be grateful for all the things you do that they cannot. They may refer to you to as a domestic Goddess due to your niftiness around the home.
Depending on your partner, you can be either a Domestic Goddess or a poor excuse for a housewife.
Which are you?
Leah left the retail and health management world a few years ago to become a freelance writer and artist. She now enjoys creating funky vibrant cartoons and illsutrations for websites, promotional materials and as gifts. Leah would love to illustrate her own children's books in the future. Presently she is creating cartoon and cartoon mascots for business clients.
Visit LeahG's Cartoon and Illustration Services website here for updates and latest art work.
I'm neither! The great thing about living alone (except for the children whose opinions of me change as quickly as their favorite toy) is that the only person who can label me is, well me. As for the past, I've been called many things by men, a domestic goddess ain't one of them! Good article. I've been reading your blog and I'm so happy you are doing what you love to do and earning a living doing it. I'm so proud of you, keep up the great work.Thanks Myla, I too live alone with the kids and must say it has it's advantages!!
Hi CB, congrats on another thought-provoking post... I think the issues you raise bear more than a passing relation to the ones you raised in the last one (Men Like Women who Need Them), in that partner compatibility is pivotal: a natural domestic goddess can be perfectly complemented by a domestic slob, and vice-versa. From my own perspective as a male single parent who puts great value on his independence and individuality, my relationship holy grail would be someone with similar standards (ie: no slob, but not OCD either - it's nice to have a life!): just do the stuff that needs to be done when it needs doing, by whoever is there to do it; and without the common (and tiring) over-analysis of who does more that who; in the knowledge that it all evens out over time. In the meantime, I'm contenting myself with training my teenage daughter to wash-up well enough to ensure we don't befall some exotic intestinal disease through dirty crockery. All the best, FP.great comments there Fakep I myself am wondering when it's socially acceptable to allow my 4 and 5 yr olds natural curiosity of the dishwasher to become 'useful' to moi! Though dishwashed cat isn't a great idea, so despite their early mastery of the controls I think kids, cats, water and electricty not a good idea.
CB, in response to your comment, don't underestimate the power of dishwashed cat - its rasping tongue can remove all manner of stubborn baked-on grime. FP:) lol I am hiding your reply from my very talented reading (neurotic as it is) cat!
Hi CB, I love your articles.tThey have a great blend of humor and practical advice, while being sensitive to all walks of life. Great job. Although, selfishly speaking, I love them because they remind me to be thankful for my amazing husband. His cooking and cleaning skills are exceptional. He helps out because he appreciates the fact that I work and do many other things, just as he does. He often surprises me with clean house. ( Did you by chance read my article "A lesson from my Husband's tool belt?) There is only one thing he does not do and that is laundry - still, I don't complain because after everything he does do, the least I can do is the laundry and judging by the pile in the hamper, we all know who is the real slacker around my house. :-) Thanks again for the smile. Blessings to you, TeresaHi Theresa, the two of you are indeed blessed. I hope I am as fortunate one day. :) Thank you for your generous comments.
You can be, it just takes lots of patience, grace, repentance and forgiveness toward one another. We didn't start off like this :-) It has been an interesting ride for sure, and hard times and all I wouldn't trade it for the world. Most of us have heard that saying "the grass is greener on the other side, but about 13 years ago I heard the added saying that "the grass may be greener, but the price is also higher" I heard that from my pastor and never forgot it. I look foward to your next article.